clarity

Life Lessons

I’ve learned and grown a lot over the last couple years. My entire world was ripped out from under me in a 6 month span. I could have collapsed. At times I wanted to. But I didn’t.

I persevered. I pushed forward. I grew. I learned. I became stronger.

I’ve learned my children will always be my motivation. Everything I do is for them. I want to be there for them and provide for them but also I want them to see resilience. I want them to know it’s okay to be hurt and life is hard but they can do it and it is worth it. I want them to know I am and will always be there for them.

I’ve learned it doesn’t matter how many years or miles separate you, good friends will always be there for you. ALWAYS.

I’ve learned friends come and go. And that’s okay.

I’ve learned some people like drama. They want to be a part of it. They will try to exploit yours or create their own to drag you into.

I’ve learned those people aren’t worth my time.

I’ve learned your emergency isn’t mine. I won’t make it mine. I can’t bear your burden and my own. I can help you help yourself. It’s all I have to offer and if you can’t help yourself, I can no longer help you either.

I’ve learned I will never be consistent posting blogs or to any other social media platform. I’m having fun and that’s all that matters.

I’ve learned I can have friends and go out with them when I want. I can buy that car or that house all on my own. I can have elective surgery if I choose. I don’t need permission from anyone but myself.

But most importantly I’ve learned we are all responsible for our own happiness. True happiness can only come from within. Being satisfied with who you are and where you are going.

I realised somewhere along the lines the biggest leap of faith one can take is to believe in oneself. Sure things will go wrong. Mistakes will be made. Don’t let that bring you down. Learn from it. Grow in spite of it.

I’ve learned I am enough. I was broken. Now I’m happy and stronger for having lived through it.

Civility

According to Merriam-Webster the definition of civility is as follows:

1 a: civilized conduct especially: COURTESY, POLITENESS. bemoaned the decline of civility in our politics

b: a polite act or expression lacked the little civilities and hypocrisies of political society— Roy Jenkins. The men briefly exchanged civilities before the meeting began.

Why do we find it so hard to be courteous and polite to one another? So often we are unnecessarily hostile and repugnant .

There have been many times in the last few months I have been amazed at how uncivilised people are. It’s just not necessary.

It takes less effort to be kind. It also makes you look like a better person. There is no need to be aggressive and belligerent. There is no to be hostile and hateful. There is no need to be destructive.

It’s the time of year when we should be kinder to each other. Let’s start with those we know, whether or not they have caused you pain, and just be nice. It doesn’t cost anything to be nice.

Have some civility.

Be kind to each other.

No one deserves to be treated poorly.

Emotions tend to cloud your judgement and blind you to the overt. This year has been an emotional monsoon for me. It can be hard to see the sun through a constant downpour of tragedy and loss. But then one day it happens.

A single ray of sun breaks through the storm. It shines a light on the one thing you needed to see to understand you’ve got this. You can survive.

I had a moment of clarity yesterday. I realised something that had always been right in front of me, staring me in the face but I didn’t want to believe it. I finally understood I am enough.

I figured out what is most important to me. My family is what I treasure. I don’t care about titles or money or anything else. What makes me happy is spending time with my children. As long as my children are happy and I get to enjoy their company, I can get through anything.

I’m still working on me. But I am actually happy. I have three children who are beautiful on the inside and out. I have a mother who supports any decision I make. I have a fantastic career. I have a place to live and food on my table. And I have a dog who is always by my side.

The rain is starting to slow down. The clouds are breaking. Clear skies are on the horizon. I will survive this storm.